What Stories Do You Tell Yourself

One of the most interesting aspects about being human is that our brains are genetically hard wired to keep us safe, above all else. This is what I refer to as our survival brain. It’s constantly asking us “How can I protect you”? And in order for our brains to protect us, it needs a story. So it says, give me a story so that I know how to protect you; One that’s concrete and that says, “good guy, bad guy”, “against you, for you”, “safe, unsafe”. And so we make up these stories that we perceive as truth, when really they’re only true to us. We convince ourselves that our story is the only one that matters instead of allowing ourselves to see the truth for what it is.

For example, when I first got introduced to the idea of life coaching, it immediately sparked my interest. I always knew that I had a calling to help others, I just didn’t know how. After years of having this inner calling, it grew bigger and bigger until one day I stumbled across a couple of amazing coaches who helped me find my inner truth and to love all of the parts of me, even the ones I like to keep hidden away. After having that amazing experience, I knew that I wanted to empower others to do the same. I knew that I wanted to become a Certified Professional Coach, but as soon as I had that thought, my fear of failure started to surface and I began to doubt myself. I began to doubt my ability to achieve my dream of becoming a coach. Why? Because the story I was telling myself was that “I wasn’t smart enough to pursue this career choice.” What a total load of crap! But by telling myself that story, my brain was trying to protect me from the one thing I feared the most…FAILURE. It kept me safe by keeping me small.

Sometimes we believe the stories we tell ourselves so much that it actually prevents us from seeing things for what they truly are. For me, the story I was telling myself prevented me from becoming a certified professional coach for about 1 year. The truth was, I was the only one standing in my way of my achieving my dream and I absolutely had the skills and intelligence to achieve it. It was a simple shift in mindset that made all of the difference!

I’m here to tell you that it’s normal for us to create these stories – in fact, it’s hardwired in our DNA, so it makes sense that our brains would create these stories to protect us. However, it’s really important to understand that these stories are something that we create out of fear. When we operate out of fear, we’re operating from an unconscious place, which means that we aren’t fully aware of ourselves, of others and of situations. And when we aren’t fully aware, we aren’t capable of making conscious choices.

So my question to you is, what stories are you telling yourself? What’s your brain trying to protect you from that you may no longer need protection from?